Monsoon

The house

Having risen into the clouds

Dampness permeating

One with the expectation of rain

Senses full

Thoughts released with the falling

Comes to rest

On the previously parched earth

Block

Enemy paper

Pencil a weapon that

Stabs

Shreds

Rends

With a dull edge

Tears dry up

Throat closes

In time to a slowing heart

The thump, thump, thump

Deadened

A mind wrapped in mud

Insulation

Isolation

The fear of being known

The only life force

Erase!

Erase!

Wipe these words from the page

From the very thoughts

Exposing

It's not real

A play

A role

A part in this imaginary score

Keeping score

Because to win this game

Is to keep it all

Keep it all locked away

From me

For me

It's never about me

Keep you happy

A happy you is a free me

Free to be left alone

Though I never really feel alone

It's never enough

Never satisfied

The ache

Throbbing pain

The thump, thump, thump

Deadened sounds

Deadened feelings

Dead hope in knowing myself